- Me: Where are the owls? WHERE ARE THE OWLS?
- Hooters Waitress: Please sir, you're causing a fuss and disturbing the other customers-
- Me: *banging my hands rhythmically on the table* WHERE-ARE-THE-OWLS? WHERE-ARE-THE-OWLS? WHERE ARE THE OWLS?
my name is timmy turner and i
peed in the ball pit at dashcon
this is my senior page
person: chris watch out! youre about to get your crocs wet!
me: I KNOW! its OK! crocs are made from a foam resin called croslite, which is made out of a polymer called ethylene-vinyl acetate! so theyre completely water proof!
when a group of teenagers walks past you and starts laughing at you for no apparent reason
"when women wear makeup they’re basically lying to us" well i don’t see why i’m being blamed for a man stupid enough to really think i have red and gold eyelids
saying feminism is unnecessary because you don’t feel oppressed is like saying fire extinguishers are unnecessary because your house isn’t on fire
what is the point of gay straight alliances why would i want to be in an alliance with straight people
Because we outnumber you.
I’m not saying it’s fair. I’m saying it’s true.
fruit flies outnumber us too but you don’t see me being in an alliance with them
Fruit flies have very little influence on our lives apart from being a nuisance
not seeing many differences between fruit flies and straight allies
- band member: so how old are you?
- me: how old do you need me to be
i’ll kick anyone’s ass. i’ll kick your ass. i’ll kick your dog’s ass. i’ll kick my own ass
BITCH U BETTA GO AWF